Do they really like the things that bind you together as friends, or is it just posturing? For deep relationships that are meaningful and last, people must know what they are getting and find you dependable.
In relationships, you share pieces of yourself with the other person. That may be your time, personal stories, your vulnerabilities, talents, and much else. That takes trust. It’s part of an in-built self-defense mechanism, but typically people don’t entrust themselves to people they know aren’t dependable or truthful.
There’s usually far too much at stake to place yourself in the hands of someone you know is duplicitous. The way that trust is built up in a relationship is through doing life together and building up a history of experiences where a person’s words and actions match up. You may be able to fake who you are for a time, but eventually, the truth comes out.
So being honest about who you are is the best way to build trust because when push comes to shove, you are you and that’s who will show up in a pinch. Posturing and then being unable to deliver is one sure way to disappoint people who have placed their trust in you.
Why honesty is so important in a relationship
Honesty is the foundation for trust in a relationship, and trust is necessary for a relationship to function and thrive.
When you’re always honest with someone, it tells them that they can trust you and the things you say. It helps them know they can believe your promises and commitments.
“Relationships are built on trust, so honesty is very important in a relationship,” relationship and well-being coach Shula Melamed, M.A., MPH said. “We depend on our partner being our port in the storm, a person who we can trust with our thoughts, feelings, and heart.”
Being honest with your partner also facilitates healthy communication, which is also necessary for a functional relationship.
READ ALSO: HONESTY IN A RELATIONSHIP, WHY IS IT SO HARD TO BE HONEST IN RELATIONSHIP
Couples need to be able to talk to each openly and be real with each other; that’s what true connection is all about.
That commitment to being honest also means that both people will be proactive about addressing any tension, conflicts, or issues in the relationship, bringing them up to their partner for discussion.
“Relationships flourish when partners trust each other to be honest and open to resolving conflict,” relationship counselor Margaret Paul, Ph.D. says “On the other hand, relationships flounder when trust is broken.
Reasons why honesty is so important in a relationship.
1* Honesty Provides Growth and Change in a Relationship
Just as we cannot grow as individuals without being honest with ourselves, we cannot grow in a relationship without being honest with each other. This can be challenging when it comes to areas of your life that you’re reluctant to share with your partner, but it’s also one of the most important aspects of an intimate relationship.
2* Honesty Builds Trust and Mutual Respect
Honesty is important because it builds trust and mutual respect, which are essential to any healthy relationship. Without honesty, there can be no trust and mutual respect – and that means a relationship has a much harder time surviving and thriving
3* Honesty Promotes Intimacy and Closeness
When you are honest with your partner, it’s easier for you to be vulnerable with him or her. You know he or she can handle the truth and won’t judge you, so you feel safe opening up to him or her in a way that strengthens your relationship.
In addition to the emotional benefits that honesty brings, there are also practical ones: being upfront about your needs is the best way to get them met! For example, if one partner wants sex more than the other (which happens often), keeping those needs quiet won’t make them go away – it’ll only make things worse if one partner feels neglected by their partner for months on end.
4* Honesty Promotes Communication and Understanding
Being honest with your partner is the best way to ensure healthy and open communication. If you don’t tell the truth, you and your partner can’t trust each other, which can lead to a lot of problems in your relationship. You may even wonder what else he or she’s keeping from you, and that can be uncomfortable for both of you.
What is trust in a relationship?
Trust is said to be the foundation of every relationship from which a strong connection can be built. Without trust between couples, relationships won’t grow and progress to a deeper level.
Trust fosters better understanding and mutual respect. It makes the relationship stronger, where both people can come together without being afraid of judgment.
Why trust is important in a Relationship
1* It boosts your confidence
Trust can actually help you achieve more in life. When you know that the person you love will be there to support you and love you even when you fail, you feel an inner strength to face and overcome even the harshest challenges. Your partner will give you the confidence to learn new skills and take new initiatives to achieve your dreams and goals.
2* You become a better person
When you trust your partner, you don’t feel uncertain or insecure about spending time apart. You become more open to giving space to your partner. As a result, you can find more time for yourself without worrying about your relationship. This allows both of you to focus on your self-development and become better human beings and partners.
3* You can control emotions better
When it comes to a relationship, it’s all about emotions. However, things can get awry when your emotions get out of hand. Being emotional individuals, we invest ourselves in building meaningful relationships because we value a person. When you trust your partner, you will know better and choose to overlook their irritating behavior. If they hurt you for some reason, trust enables you to realize that there is some reason for their behavior. This helps you to develop a healthy, long-lasting relationship
4* It reassures your relationship
At times, we all tend to doubt and wonder if our partner loves us as much we love them. Due to the daily grind, we are mostly unable to shower our partners with love or express our feelings towards them. This can start building a distance between partners. But with trust, you are reassured that your spouse or partner loves you irrespective of the busy schedules, fights, and arguments
5* Trust & love go hand in hand
If you knew that a person would definitely cheat on you, would you still choose to love them? No. you won’t. No one wants to get their heart broken deliberately. As rational human beings, we can only love people we trust. It is the building block of a relationship. Love is born out of trust. You still may be attracted to that person, but you can’t love them. A relationship that is not based on trust will never survive the test of time.
READ ALSO: TRUST ISSUES, MEANING, SIGNS, CAUSE AND HOW TO OVERCOME IT
How long does it take to build trust in a relationship?
Trust is not a given; it is often earned over time. And earning trust requires time in any relationship.
Romantic relationships are an ongoing practice in building trust, where you can keep getting better as time passes. Every stage of a relationship has its challenges, and that might test your trust in your partner differently each time.
Maintaining a healthy body is a life-long effort, but it gets easier if you have the right habits and mindset. The same applies to maintaining healthy relationships that are built on mutual trust and respect.
It might be challenging to trust your partner when you don’t know them that well. But by learning how to build trust in a relationship, you can make your relationship better while getting to know your partner better.
Signs of trust in a relationship
Are you and your partner in a vicious cycle of doubt and mistrust? Here is a list to help you distinguish signs of trust in relationships and assess your situation
1* Not afraid to be yourself
The most obvious sign of trust in a relationship is when you are not afraid to be yourself around your partner, and they feel the same. It points at mutual respect and understanding that has developed within the relationship.
Each partner can flourish when they allow the other the space to be who they are, without negative judgment. All of us are different, so why try to mold your partner into what you want? Instead, why not appreciate and celebrate their individuality?
2* Admitting when you are unhappy
A big sign of trust is when you can tell your partner if you are unhappy with any aspect of the relationship. It showcases that you are not afraid of their reaction to something, and you know that they will work with you to find a solution.
3* Don’t feel controlled/manipulated
Sharing your life with someone is difficult, and it becomes painful when they are trying to control your actions and words. Your partner could do it directly by letting you know what you should change, or they could use effective manipulation to ensure the change.
You can’t trust someone when they try to control you as they don’t appreciate you as you are. A controlling partner might look at you and try to get rid of things that make you who you are.
How to build trust in a romantic relationship
Building trust is a two-way process, it is important to trust and equally important to be trusted. That requires mutual effort and commitment. Before building trust, you need to understand each other’s expectations and what trust means to you. Here are some ways to build trust in your relationship
1* Admit your mistakes
It’s natural to make mistakes, but owning them is not easy. The first thing on your agenda of building trust is to admit your mistakes. Don’t try to cover up your mistakes; the situation becomes messier if you do so. Repentance shows that you want to build trust.
2* Don’t hide your feelings
Being open about your emotions is often an effective way to build trust. Furthermore, if people know that you care, they are more likely to trust you.
Emotional intelligence plays a role in building trust. Acknowledging your feelings, learning the lessons that prevail, and taking productive action means that you won’t deny reality—this is the key to building trust.
3* Forgive each other
And when your spouse owns up his/her mistake, be humble enough to forgive. Don’t hold on to past fights, let go, accept, and make the most of ‘now’.
4* Value the relationships that you have—and don’t take them for granted
Trust often results from consistency. We tend to have the most trust in people who are there for us consistently through good times and bad. Regularly showing someone that you’re there for them is an effective way to build trust.
5* Earn your trust
Trust is not readily available in any relationship. You need to earn it by taking care of your behavior and actions.
READ ALSO: RELATIONSHIP DISHONESTY,SIGNS REASONS AND CONSEQUENCES
6* Communicate transparently
Talk openly and honestly and make sure that you discuss important things in person instead of texting or talking on the phone. Messages can be misinterpreted. Talking face-to-face is easier as you can understand each other’s intentions, emotions, and body language. Effective communication is an important element in building trust.
7* Be exemplary
Behave the way you want your spouse to be. It’s as simple as that. Be truthful, responsible, faithful, caring, and honest; all these will influence your spouse to reciprocate.
8* Show interest
Know your partner’s tastes and hobbies. Show your genuine interest by being inquisitive, ask questions, and learn from them. If your spouse gets the vibes of your sincerity, you will earn their trust.
Keep your promises
When you make a promise make sure you stick to it. Don’t make promises just for the sake of keeping your partner happy because breaking a promise is one the easiest ways to breach trust.
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A life lived in love, will never be dull 